I lost my way....

Let me be completely transparent and vulnerable with you.... 
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These last few days I have been moving through some very murky waters. Yesterday I was at that point where I was so deep in mud I couldn’t see a way out. 
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I have been pulling out all of my tools from my tool box; breathwork, meditation, journaling and more. It wasn’t shifting. The mud was still thick. 
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This morning I woke up still feeling this heaviness of what I have been moving through, still deep in the mud. I forced myself to go to the gym, when all wanted to do was go back to sleep. I came home and meditated for a hour.
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It was still there. 
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I reached out to my tribe for help and still, this “thing” was not budging. 
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Somehow, I managed to hold on to this deeper knowing that the answer was going to come. I knew that I was in deep waters, and this was going to be a huge lesson. 
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The afternoon came and still nothing. Still in darkness. 
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I had about a hour and a half before I had to pick up my daughters from school. I didn’t want to spew my mud on them. 
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So, I sat my a$$ in front of my alter and said, “I am not leaving this alter until something shifts”. 
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On the floor bowing at my alter in desperation for clarity. Begging my Guides to clear the path, to help me see clearly. I would not allow myself to open my eyes or even wipe my tears. 
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I sat and I waited while to tears drenched my face. 
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As I got really focused on my breath, opened my pelvic floor and allowed the energy of the Earth to flow through me, I started to feel a slight shift, a small opening. Still unclear, I didn’t move a muscle. 
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I was immediately transported on a journey. First, taken back to my journey to Machu Picchu, standing at the top of that majestic mountain. Watching the sun rise over the dramatic mountains. It was like a real life scene out of the movie Avatar. I had never seen a sight as beautiful as this. Immediate I burst in to hysterical tears as this Sacred land tore my heart wide open. 
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I was then taken back to the deep Jungle of Peru, where I trained under one of my Shamanic teachers. 
Specifically taken into the Maloca that sat in the middle of dense Jungle, it was the darkest night I’d ever seen. Zero city light pollution. The birds, bats and, bugs sang all night long circling the Maloca. The air was warm and moist that enveloped me like a mother’s womb. The Shaman sang his Icaros to us all night as we sat in ceremony. I have never felt more connected to Patchamama like I did in this moment. Tears flowed down my face that night from the purest love I’d ever felt. Again, on the floor at my alter, my heart tore open even more as I re-membered this experience. 
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Last, I was taken to Glastonbury. Where I visited Sacred sites that were alive with deep Earth her-story. This place has a very different energy. For me, here I could feel a deep connection with Kryst (Christ) Consciousness. The moment I arrived, the Sacred land purged me, I was up all night as the energy flushed my body with flu-like symptoms. This was to make space for these new Kryst codes to enter my body. The energy of the Earth would rise up into my pelvic floor and gush into my heart. Yet another moment of Divine Earth connection that once again tore my heart further open as I was still bowed at my alter. 
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Still on the floor of my alter bawling. I sat up as I could feel the journey coming to a close. Just then the most beautiful song to Kryst began to play, I sang from the depths of my being opening further in this moment, allowing this journey to flow through me. Allowing my heart to blast further open and to surrender to everything that was moving through me. 
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Then, the lesson came... 
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I was so disconnected from life-force Earth energy. I was so caught up in “human-ing”, I had lost my way. In this moment, with every cell of my being, I once again, recommitted to my path, to my mission, to the reason I was birthed into physical form. 
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Phew. The light that came through me in this moment could have lit up the entire Galaxy. I am the Earth. I came from the Earth. She chose me. She prayed for me to be birthed into the physical. She prayed for my codes. 
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With this, came an even deeper realization. 
My mission. 
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I can see even clearer now, those that I am being called to serve. I cannot serve those that are looking for a quick fix, or those that want me to “fix” them. 
I am here to serve those that are really ready to roll up their sleeves and dive in. Those that are willing to face-off with themselves. Those that are brave enough to fully step into their highest calling. These Soulmate clients are ready for my Medicine. They have been looking for a deep Soul resonance. They are ready to receive my codes that I was birthed with. The codes that are embedded in my Soul blueprint. They don’t see any other solutions. They have hit a wall. They are tired and ready to surrender to my Medicine. They are FINALLY ready to heal, to unravel generational cycles.
May I ask you this:
- Are you ready to roll up your sleeves and get dirty? 
- Are you ready to break free from the parasitic stories? 
- Can you continue living the way you have been, or is the only option you see is to heal? 
- Are you ready to awaken to your dormant Shaman?